“Unsubstantiated rumors. The same unsubstantiated rumors that ran around behind those two for the seven years they worked together in the Bartlet Administration. You think if there was something to them, that card wouldn’t have already been played? Josh Lyman’s made a lot of enemies over the years…”

“This wouldn’t even be a thing if they’d just come out and…”

“And what, Phil? Bare their souls to Barbara Walters?”

“Like that’s ever going to happen,” Josh muttered. He dug through the sections of the Washington Post that littered the sofa searching for the remote. Finding it, he stabbed the power button and returned his attention to the editorial on the Superfund lawsuit the administration was facing in the Pacific Northwest.

“Anyway, I gave her the ‘What a Shame’ file and attached bullet pointed index cards to every subject packet,” Donna continued, telling Josh how she’d decided to handle the First Lady’s inability to settle on an agenda as she walked past the back of the sofa.

“There was a lot of good stuff in that file. She ought to be able to find something to work on,” Josh agreed without looking up from the paper. At the moment, he could care less how Donna motivated the First Lady, as long as she did. He knew Donna was bored and frustrated and while she had been great about understanding how busy he was, he felt guilty that she’d decided to take the job in the East Wing partly because of their relationship. The consequences of the last time Donna was professionally unfulfilled were still fresh in his mind.

“Do you even remember what’s in that file?” Donna teased from the bedroom.

“Stuff we never had time to work on, but should have made time for. If you’d made me bullet pointed index cards, maybe we would have gotten somewhere on that stuff,” Josh quipped.

“Cute, funny boy. Hey, you haven’t seen my travel hair dryer, have you?”

“Why? Are you traveling somewhere?”

“No. I’m trying to find it so I can leave it here and take my full-sized one back to my apartment.” Donna appeared in the doorway from the bedroom with her hands on her hips.

Josh looked up from the paper with a confused look on his face. “Why are you taking your hair dryer back to your apartment?”

“Because the twitchy chick from Treasury finally found an apartment of her own, so I can move back in.”

“You’re moving back into your apartment?” Josh couldn’t help the squeak in his voice.

“Yes.”

“You’re moving out?” Josh scrambled off the sofa, his confusion quickly turning into panic.

“Josh, we talked about this last weekend. I asked if you would help me move some stuff and you said yes.” Donna shook her head, somewhat hurt that he didn’t remember their discussion from last Sunday.

“I thought you meant move more of your stuff in here, not move your stuff out of here. Those are two completely different things.”

“I told you Tammy had found a place to live. Why would I move more of my stuff in here if the woman subletting my apartment was finally moving out?” Donna asked.

“I remember the conversation! You asked me to help you move some things and I said sure. You didn’t say from where to where!” Josh insisted.

Donna shook her head again. “Because you said ‘sure, just tell me where and when’ and went back to watching CNN. This didn’t seem like a big deal to you last week. Why are you making it a thing now?”

“Because you’re moving out!”

“My living here was never permanent, Josh,” Donna’s eyes flashed. She had asked for his help last week and he hadn’t batted an eyelash. Now all of a sudden it was a problem? “I have four months left on my lease and I don’t have $4,000 to throw away paying rent at a place I’m not living in. Now, have you seen my travel hair dryer?”

SMASH CUT TO OPENING TITLES

ACT ONE

INT. JOSH’S OFFICE, MONDAY MORNING

“Lou, what’s the message this week?” Josh stalked into his office. The staff traded glances. Josh was in a mood and they were all about to suffer for it.

“Education.”

“Education. This week’s message is education. Yet there was an op/ed in the Washington Post this week with blind quotes from one of our people about the Superfund lawsuit, and the closing topic on Hardball was whether or not Donna and I should bare our souls to Barbara Walters. Why was that?”

“Because nature abhors a vacuum?” Lester piped up to the amusement of everyone but Josh.

“You know, Lester’s right,” Lou chimed in when the chuckling died away. “If you two would just throw the media a bone and sit down with…”

“The White House doesn’t comment on the personal lives of staffers,” Sam interrupted, noting the imminent eruption on Josh’s face. “Trust me that at one point or another you will all be glad for that policy in the next four years.”

“Tell me how we’re going to recapture the news cycle?” Josh glared at everyone in the room in turn before settling on the now mute press secretary. “Lester?”

After a few moments of uncomfortable silence, Amy Gardner came to Lester’s rescue. “I can get up on the Hill and start feeling people out on some of our education proposals,” she offered. “The minute word gets around we’re shopping the reform package people will start howling, though. Are we ready for the heat?”

Sam gave her a look wondering just what she was up to, but Josh nodded and then turned to look at Lou. “Lou? Do you think you can keep our people on topic the rest of the week?”

“Our people aren’t the problem, Josh. Our people are on topic,” Lou retorted. This was why she had never taken a job in government before. There were just too many variables to control for too long. It was too easy to lose control of the message. “It’s not that hard to stay on topic if the topic is something the media wants to talk about. The problem is that the media doesn’t want to talk about education right now. They want to talk about this Superfund lawsuit that we barely know anything about and you and your girlfriend, which we can’t comment about.”

“Since someone in this building is feeding anonymous quotes about both subjects to the media and those quotes showed up in an op/ed in the Post yesterday, you’ll pardon me if I have trouble believing you. Nail down the leaks and get the fundamentals of our education reform policy out there,” Josh barked.

“I’m sorry. How, exactly, do you know the leaks are coming from Communications?” Lou refused to be intimidated.

“I don’t care if the leaks are coming from the East Wing, Lou. Plug them. Amy, get up the Hill and get the feel of the place, but it’s an intelligence gathering visit only. Get the lay of the land and find out where we’re going to have problems. I’d like to hear about them from you before I read about them on the front page of the New York Times, but promise nothing. Anything else?” Josh waited half a heartbeat for everyone to shake their heads. “Good. Everyone get to work. Sam?”

Sam waited until Lou, Otto, Lester and Amy filtered out of the office. “You’re giving education to Amy?” he asked, his voice a mix of concern over Amy’s ability to handle the issue, and hurt feelings that Josh seemed to be taking it away from him. “I thought we’d agreed that I would take the lead on education reform. This is going to require a deft touch and she’s more of a bull in a china shop.”

“I’m sending Amy up to the Hill to feel things out. The two of you sit down when she gets back and start to devise a strategy for getting what we want.”

“I can do that, sure. It’s just the education thing is important and…”

“The education reform package is very important, but these first meetings, Sam buddy, they’re below your paid grade. Let Amy have them, just keep a close eye on her. You okay with that?”

“Yeah, and you’re right. I’m up to my eyeballs in the Baker confirmation, I don’t have time to be up on the Hill all day listening to people ramble on about whatever,” Sam agreed.

“And thanks for…” Josh trailed off, looking down at his desk and fiddling uncomfortably with the papers covering it.

He accepted that the staff blamed him for the situation, but there’d been no doubt in his mind they were off stage when he had kissed Donna so passionately in the Convention Center. If he’d thought there was any chance people or photographers could see them, he’d have never been so demonstrative. The magazine covers had left him feeling naked and violated and he had little desire to repeat the experience on national television. Never mind the effect all the pressure and attention was having on his ability to control his temper. On top of the fact that his job was to stay the hell out of the spotlight and put the focus on his boss’s agenda.

Sam chose his words carefully. They’d had this conversation before and he doubted Josh would be any more receptive today than he had been previously. “You know Lester has a point.”

“Sam…” Josh began, clearly tired of discussing the issue.

“Look, I know you’re sick of it, but even Leo made a statement about his drug addiction.” Sam paused at the door.

“Do you honestly think that if we do an interview, these people will go away? Throw them a bone? Give them a little something?” Josh lost his patience and snapped, the frustrations of the past several weeks pouring out of him. “Donna and I talked about it and we agreed, doing an interview sets the precedent that the press has access to our personal lives, Sam, and we’re not giving them that. Ever. Because once we give it away, we can never take it back. We can never say no and we don’t want People magazine telling us when I have to propose or Donna has to get pregnant or whatever! We want our personal life to be personal. Just because our salaries are public record does not mean we are fair game for the media!”

“But at one point you both were,” Sam pointed out, refusing to take being the object of Josh’s frustrated scolding personally. He’d poked the hornets nest, he’d known he was likely to get stung.

“Just because you get shot or blown up in a car bomb and somebody takes pictures of it or writes a newspaper article about it doesn’t make you a celebrity. It makes you a victim of crime or terrorism. And remind me again just how many interviews I gave after I got out of the hospital?” Josh stared at his deputy. “Oh, wait, I remember. None. The exact same number as Donna gave. We both made a choice to return to the White House and our jobs and anonymity and to not do interviews and to not sue anybody and to not sell our stories to Hollywood. Does that sound like something a public figure does?”

Sam looked down at the floor before he looked back up at his friend. “And Donna really agrees with you on this?”

Josh ran his hands through his hair and chuckled once ruefully. “You mean did I uncork on her like I just did on you? No. Did we talk bout it? Yes, we did and she said she understood and agreed. Look, I’m sorry, but it’s getting old to hear it every single day from people.”

“I’d imagine it probably does,” Sam empathized. “Just, you know, try not to do that to anybody else.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m going to go work.”

Taking a deep breath, Josh gathered himself after Sam’s departure and entered the Oval Office. As bad as his week was starting, he couldn’t let the President see it. It was Monday morning and they had a long week ahead. He needed to do everything he could to keep Matt in a decent mood and that meant putting on a happy face in the Oval Office. He stood quietly against the curved wall while General McClain and the head of the CIA completed their daily briefing on Kazakhstan.

“Both the Chinese and Russian armies are maintaining their positions, sir, and everything is relatively calm.”

“What about recon flights? Is either side trying to conduct them?” Santos asked, looking at the overhead satellite imagery of the dug-in opposing armies.

“We’re patrolling the no-fly zone at both low altitudes with Army and Marine Corps helicopters and at higher altitudes with AWACS directed fighter aircraft. We’re also taking this opportunity to refine the doctrine for the new Joint STARS program,” the General explained.

“I don’t know that I’ve heard of that before.”

“It’s part of the new digital battlefield, sir. It’s the Joint Surveillance Target Attack Radar System. It’s a plane equipped with a long-range, air-to-ground surveillance system designed to locate, classify and track ground targets in all weather conditions. They’re testing it in coordination with the Ranger units we’ve got on the ground conducting recon of the Chinese and Russian positions.”

“Do I want to know how close those guys are getting to those positions?” Santos asked.

The CIA chief shook his head. “I’ve seen the photos, Mr. President. Let’s just say we know what flavor vodka the Russians are drinking and that the Chinese aren’t eating Minute Rice.”

“Tell those guys to keep safe. I don’t want to make any more phone calls.” Matt stood up. “Thank you, gentlemen.”

“The digital battlefield.” The President shook his head in wonder once the two men left the office. “I remember when I was going through Officers’ Basic Course at Quantico the only thing digital on the battlefield was my watch.”

“I thought you were a pilot, sir,” Josh replied. “What were you doing on the battlefield?”

“I was a pilot, but the Marine Corps, in its infinite wisdom, still made me run around the boondocks conducting the platoon in assault drills before I could go learn how to fly airplanes. Every marine is a rifleman, Josh, didn’t you know that?”

“So you could repel boarders if it came down to that, sir?”

“Now that you mention it, that’s something they never taught us how to do,” Santos chuckled. “If the commies ever come for the Presidential Yacht, we might be screwed. What can I do for you?”

“I’m sending Amy up to the Hill to lay the groundwork for the education plan. Do a little recon work, so to speak.”

“Can she take pictures of what kind of vodka they’re drinking up there?”

“I knew I should have asked the CIA for a pinhole camera.”

“What’s going on with this thing in the Northwest?”

“Nothing for you to worry about.”

“You sure?”

“If we’re talking about the Superfund lawsuit, then yes, sir. It’s nothing we can’t handle. I’m heading down to the Counsel’s office later today and we’ll get it taken care of.”

“Okay.” Matt nodded and Josh turned to leave. Before he could reach the door, Matt spoke again. “Hey, what do you think about the new HPV vaccine?”

“Sir?”

“What do you think the FDA advisory panel is going to recommend?”

“I think they’re going to recommend approval. The vaccine looked good in clinical trials, and there’s no reason we shouldn’t be preventing cancer.”

“Yeah?”

“You’re worried about the religious right?” Josh asked.

“And you aren’t?” The idea of Josh not worrying about the political downside of something made Matt chuckle.

“It’s education week.” Josh spread his arms wide.

“Yeah.”

“I’ve got a meeting.”

“Go.” Matt waved his Chief of Staff out of the room.

CUT TO:

INT. LESTER’S OFFICE, SAME TIME

“Do you see any other way of getting this thing to disappear?” Lou asked Lester.

They were standing on opposite sides of Lester’s office with the door closed, strategizing.

“At this point, no. And I’m not sure that there ever was. It’s the first and last topic brought up in the gaggle almost every day. Not a day goes by that one of those right-wing tinfoil hat-wearing blogs isn’t coming up with some kind of new conspiracy that trickles its way into the gaggle somehow. I have to assign an intern to monitor these sites just so my jaw doesn’t hit the floor at the audacity of some of these questions.”

“They aren’t hitting the press room are they?” Lou asked.

“No,” Lester shook his head. “But I don’t doubt it will eventually. Right now, they’re still cute. Everyone still loves them, but what if somebody hits on something? What if this thing turns ugly? Don’t we want to be in control of the story by then?”

“I’ve tried, you’ve tried, Sam’s tried…” Lou shook her head.

“Have you tried Donna? You guys were pretty close during the campaign. Maybe she’d be more receptive to the idea,” suggested Lester.

“I tried that last week. Those two have some serious message discipline. We ought to try bottling that for the rest of the staff.” As frustrating as her trip to the East Wing had been, Lou was impressed by Josh and Donna’s united front.

“Who else is there that could convince them to just do a damn interview?”

Lou scratched her chin. “There’s only one person left.”

“Who?” Lester asked.

“The President.”

“You want to go over Josh’s head, directly to the President?” Lester shook his head. “Man, Lou, I don’t know if that’s the greatest idea or not.”

“Who else is there?”

“You want to go in there, just the two of us?”

Lou thought about it for a second. “I’ll get Sam on board.”

“You get Sam on board, I’m in.”

CUT TO:

INT. DONNA’S OFFICE, SAME TIME

“People magazine! For the second time!”

“This is mortifying.”

“And US Weekly.”

“I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you.”

“Should I look for you two on the cover of the National Enquirer soon? White House Chiefs of Staff Secretly Marry and Have Alien Baby!”

“Annabeth!” Donna moaned while letting her head drop to her desk. While she hadn’t agreed with Josh’s hard-line stance on not giving an interview at first, she couldn’t argue with his fundamental reasoning. It was a bad precedent to set and it would give the press extraordinary access to their lives that neither of them was sure they could control in the future. The downside was the constant pressure they were both getting from their colleagues to make everyone’s life easier and move the story off the front page and she was really getting annoyed with everyone’s selfishness on the issue. It seemed like they wanted her to make her own life harder so their jobs would be easier.

“Oh come on, Donna. I said the National Enquirer thing as a joke. So the gossip rags are interested in you two, give someone an interview, get the hounds off the scent and move on,” the petite blonde advised her friend while perching herself on the edge of the same desk Donna’s head rested on.

Picking her head up and resting it in her hand, Donna launched her well-rehearsed response. “We are not the story. There is not a story here! Plus, we have actual work to do. Josh has a vice-president to confirm, an education reform plan to sell to the country and I’m chief of staff to a First Lady who has no idea what she wants to do besides check her kids’ homework!”

“Feel better?”

Donna took a deep breath and shook her head, looking miserable. “Not really.”

“What’s the matter?” Annabeth got the feeling that whatever was troubling Donna had little to do with the media or the First Lady.

“Don’t worry about it,” Donna replied, busying herself by going over Helen’s schedule.

This was the problem with having your personal life splashed across the headlines, Donna decided. Everything had to stay hunky-dory. She couldn’t be upset because Josh grudgingly helped her move the day before and then declined her invitation to stay for dinner and refused to answer any of her phone calls the entire night. She couldn’t be upset with him because, according to People magazine, they were the second coming of Camelot and Camelot, last time she checked, was perfect And things between her and Josh were not exactly perfect right now.

“If it’s bothering you, you should talk about it.”

Donna sighed, wishing it were that simple. The stories about her and Josh being perfect were bad enough. Stories about her and Josh having a spat would be worse. The minute she breathed a word of it, someone would overhear her and it would be everywhere. “We have things to do, you know.”

“No, we don’t.”

“Annabeth!”

“Donna, I get the same schedule you do. There’s nothing on it today.”

“I’d like to make a change to that.”

“Ma’am!” “Mrs. Santos!” Donna and Annabeth both jumped to their feet.

“I’m sorry for barging in, but there wasn’t anybody in the outer office,” Helen pointed back over her shoulder.

“My assistant likes to go get coffee right about now,” Donna explained. “What can we do for you?”

“I looked through this.” Helen held up the battered file Donna had given her the week before. “There are a lot of good ideas in here.”

“Why don’t we sit?” Donna suggested, gesturing to the loveseat and chairs in one corner of her huge office. She had a feeling this was going to take all morning and couldn’t be more grateful for the interruption. “Or we could move into your office, ma’am?”

“No, no,” Helen led them over to the small sitting area. “This is fine. Like I said, I looked through this and there’s some great stuff in here. Foreign adoptions, mentoring, this is all stuff I could get behind that would make a huge difference in people’s lives. And I know I told you I thought I wanted to focus on children’s issues.”

“But?” Donna prompted.

“But, while Matt was flipping channels yesterday morning after Mass, I caught someone talking about how there’s a new vaccine going through the approval process at the FDA. A vaccine for HPV.”

Donna nodded. She hadn’t seen the show, but she knew what Helen was talking about. “It’s being reviewed by one of the advisory committees right now.”

“One of them? How many advisory committees are there?” Helen asked.

“Typically, a drug is reviewed by two or three. If I remember right, this particular drug was put on an accelerated development and review track, so I’m not 100% certain what hoops there are for it.”

“You know the drug I’m talking about?”

“Yes, ma’am,” Donna replied.

“Here’s the thing. When I mentioned to Matt how great it would be to have a vaccine for HPV because, as I’m sure you know, HPV causes cervical cancer, he got political on me. I don’t want to see this vaccine waylaid by the political process. So, I want to make this my first issue. The HPV vaccine.”

“It is a sensitive political issue ma’am,” Donna pointed out cautiously. She didn’t want to kill the first sign of fire Helen had shown, but she needed to be realistic too.

“It’s a drug that cures a common infection that causes cervical cancer and you’re telling me there are people in this country who think that’s a bad thing?” Helen asked.

“I’d have to do some research to be completely certain, but I believe the manufacturer recommendation on this drug is that girls as young as age 11 receive this vaccination,” Donna explained the political pitfall of the promising pharmaceutical. “There are certain people, interest groups, busybodies if you will, who maintain that vaccinating girls that young against an STD gives them a license to have sex outside the covenant of marriage.”

“Never mind the fact their future husbands might be out dallying around and picking it up to pass on to them inside the covenant of marriage and nobody on the religious right seems to care much about that,” said Helen with a disgusted roll of her eyes.

CUT TO:

INT. OPERATIONS BULLPEN, MID-DAY

“Bram,” Lou began, walking up to him at the coffee machine. “You haven’t been talking to any reporters have you?”

“I got your email, Lou and I swear I didn’t talk to anybody. Besides, who’d want to talk to me? I’m just an assistant deputy chief of staff. An anonymous cog in the system, if you will.” Bram poured his coffee and hurried off toward the bullpen area he shared with some of Sam’s other assistant deputies.

“Hey, at least you have a job in the White House. Think of all the Republicans who don’t,” Lou called after him.

“Now that’s a pep talk,” Sam laughed from the door to his office where he’d observed the end of the brief exchange.

“What? It’s true. Did he look guilty to you?” Lou asked, pointing in the direction Bram went.

Sam shrugged. “Not really. What are you doing, by the way?”

“I’m trying to nail down the leak.” Her lack of success was written all over Lou’s face.

“By personally interviewing every West Wing staffer?”

“And everyone in the East Wing.” Lou wasn’t sure which prospect was less enticing. Her last trip to the East Wing to try talking sense to Donna about doing an interview had ended with her having to listen to Donna recite all the reasons why the couple wouldn’t be appearing on Oprah any time soon.

“Can I give you a piece of advice?” Sam offered.

“What?”

“Josh didn’t say find the leaker. He said stop the leaks. Send out an email to the staff reminding them that all leaks to the press need to be approved by the Chief of Staff, the Communications Director or the Press Secretary. Anyone found to be in violation of that policy faces disciplinary action, up to and including losing their job.”

“I already did. I’m personally following up with people as I see them. You have any suggestions about how to handle the East Wing?”

“Don’t ‘handle’ them for starters.” Sam couldn’t help the bad taste he suddenly got in his mouth at the memories of liaising with Dr. Bartlet’s staff. “Donna and Annabeth used to work in the West Wing, they know the deal.”

“Just go over there and politely ask that if they ever plan on leaking anything they give you or me or Lester a head’s up about it,” Josh interrupted. He tilted his head towards Sam’s office. Sam took the hint and ushered Josh in.

“I need to talk to you later, Sam,” Lou called before Josh shut the door in her face.

“And I need you to kill the Superfund lawsuit,” Josh announced with no preamble.

“I don’t think I’m the best person to assign this thing to.” Sam leaned back in his chair and twirled a pencil through his fingers.

“I do.”

“Josh, this is really a job for the Counsel’s office. Which is where I delegated it after you gave it to me.” Sam said, standing up so he and Josh were on even footing.

“And you’ll work with the Counsel’s office on it,” Josh acknowledged Sam’s uneasiness. “I’m not asking you to litigate it. This thing has the potential to blow up in our faces and I want to make damn sure we’re covering the political bases. Have you looked at this thing at all? The plaintiffs are alleging that the EPA prematurely declared the site to be cleaned up and there might have been a pay-off involved. This is something we’re going to have investigate fully and fairly.”

“You know Lauren’s involved in this thing, Josh. She served me with the papers!” Sam protested. “It is a conflict of interest.”

“Lauren didn’t seem to think it was a conflict of interest for her to be involved or she wouldn’t have served you with the papers,” Josh pointed out. He looked at Sam for a long moment and lowered his voice. “Plus, I know she leaked those quotes…” he trailed off, leaving the rest unspoken.

Sam dropped his pencil on his desk and put his hands on his hips. He had been planning to tell Josh that it had been Lauren who had inadvertently given those quotes to a Post reporter at a firm party the weekend before, but the proper opportunity hadn’t presented itself yet.

“How did you figure it out?”

“The details on the Superfund lawsuit were a close hold inside the building: you, me, Lou, the President and the Counsel’s office. The quote was pretty specific and it sounded like you. Plus, the education stuff came from the conversation you and I had last week. I know you’re rusty, but you’re not that rusty,” Josh shrugged. He had decided late the night before there was little point in tearing Sam’s head off over it. He was gradually learning there were better ways to drive points home than screaming at people. “That left Lauren.”

“So you’re doing this to teach me a lesson?”

“I’m doing this because you’re the Deputy Chief of Staff and this thing needs the type of deft political touch only you possess. Plus, you’re a lawyer and I know for a fact you work well with Ainsley Hayes. I’m counting on the two of you to wrap this up quickly and efficiently.”

“So I’m not being punished?” Sam asked as Josh opened the door.

“Oh yeah, you’re being punished,” Josh called over his shoulder in a voice so similar to Leo’s that Sam had to laugh.

FADE TO BLACK

ACT TWO

INT. OPERATIONS BULLPEN, MID-AFTERNOON

Bram stared at his computer screen rereading Lou’s email from that morning: “The purpose of this email is to remind all staffers of this administration’s policy on leaks to the media. All media contacts and leaks MUST be approved by the Communications Director, the Press Secretary or the Chief of Staff directly. Any unapproved leaks are grounds for disciplinary action including suspension or termination. If you are confused by what constitutes a leak, please see your supervisor or the Communications Director.”

“Do you think she’s serious about this whole termination thing?” he asked the young man whose desk faced his. Bram didn’t particularly like the guy, but he was the only one around to ask.

“Who and what termination thing?” Andrew replied without looking up from his research.

“Lou. In her email this morning about leaks.”

“I have no idea. If you’re confused, why don’t you ask Sam or Lou?”

“Yeah,” Bram muttered.

“And if you aren’t going to do that, why don’t you work on that vetting file you’re supposed to have done by the end of the day tomorrow that you haven’t even started?”

“How do you know I haven’t started it yet?”

Andrew met Bram’s eyes. “Because Sam gave you the assignment this morning in the deputies meeting and I have yet to see you, you know, work on it.”

“Ass-kiss,” Bram muttered under his breath.

CUT TO:

INT. WHITE HOUSE RESIDENCE, SAME TIME

“If you carry the one, then add one plus two you get three,” Helen explained to Peter. The kids had been home from school long enough to eat a snack and start on their homework and Peter was having trouble with multiplication.

“Mrs. Santos?” Donna interrupted.

“Do as many by yourself as you can, and I’ll be back to help you with the rest,” Helen told Peter. She got up and ushered Donna into Matt’s private study.

“What’s up?” she asked.

“I’ve finished up my preliminary research into the HPV vaccine and it is under review by the final advisory committee right now. Everything indicates that it will be recommended for approval and that the FDA will follow that recommendation.”

“You didn’t come all the way up here to tell me that. What’s bothering you, Donna?”

“Ma’am, I’m hearing from some of my contacts in the FDA that there’s a huge political fight brewing over this. And it’s not only on the Hill, although parts of it could play out there. This is going to be a media battle and I want to make sure that you know what we could be in for.”

“Are you advising me not to pursue this?” Helen couldn’t believe Donna would be the sort to back away from a fight.

“No, I just want to you realize that by publicly supporting the approval of this drug, we could be backing the West Wing into a corner that costs them a lot of capital in a fight they hadn’t planned on or, worst case scenario, they’ll have to hang us out to dry to protect other parts of their agenda. I think you need to be prepared for all the potential outcomes,” Donna explained.

“I don’t understand.”

“If the religious right raises enough of a stink, they could put pressure on Congress to make the President pay on other issues. For instance they could say he didn’t lean on the FDA enough so they’re going to hold up his VP confirmation even more or his education bill or something else the President really wants passed. The President essentially has three options,” Donna paused to make sure Helen was still with her. The complexities of political retribution could be difficult to understand if you’d never experienced them first hand. Fortunately, her years in the West Wing gave her volumes of experience to draw on. “One is that a successful PR campaign can be mounted and we come out the winners. Two is that we’re right and Congress is wrong and he’ll live with the consequences I just mentioned. Three is that he’ll cave and lean on the FDA to shelve the drug and we’ll face a huge public failure our first time out on a major issue. Then the questions start about why was the First Lady involved in this at all.”

“Matt wouldn’t do that.” Helen shook her head.

“I don’t think he would either and on the off chance he would try to, I don’t think Josh would let him, but I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t advise you that it was a possibility.”

“Okay. So what do you think we should do?”

“I think you need to talk to the President about what you want to do. I don’t mean ask his permission, I mean advise him of your intent and ask him if you’ll have his support,” Donna advised. She’d spent the better part of the day thinking up a strategy to do this with the West Wing’s support, but without their direct involvement. She wanted this opportunity too badly to let Josh’s people into her sandbox. “Let him know you understand what a sensitive issue this is for him, but you think it’s too important to turn into a political football. This is curing cancer and nothing should be more important than that. We will need to work with them on a strategy for discussing sex education, but if you stray too far from what they want, we can always say you were expressing your personal opinions. What do you think?”

Helen considered her Chief of Staff without speaking and realized for the first time how lucky she was to have hired this extraordinarily talented and savvy woman. She hadn’t really thought of being an activist First Lady until Sunday. She had seen the skill with which Donna had worked the press during the campaign, had great respect for her and figured if anyone could keep her underwear out of the paper again, it would be Donna, but she’d hadn’t realized Donna knew so much about policy and strategy.

“Well, I think you’re going to have to go over that again before I understand it,” Helen said with a self-depreciating grin. “Possibly two or three times and use small words. But it sounded great.”

Donna smiled and looked down at her hands before meeting Helen’s eyes. “There are two ways to broach the topic. You can talk to the President when he comes upstairs tonight or you can call Ronna and ask her to schedule you five minutes with him in the Oval.”

“What do you suggest?”

“Call Ronna. If you want him to take you as seriously as you’re taking the issue, you need to keep it out of the Residence. You talk to the President and I’ll talk to Josh. Just remember, we’re advising them of our intentions and keeping them in the loop, not asking their permission.”

CUT TO:

INT. SAM’S OFFICE, LATE AFTERNOON

“Hey, do you…” Lou started to knock on Sam’s open door only to find him staring out his window at the South Lawn. “You know the snow’s not going to melt any faster if you watch it, right?”

Sam spun around in his chair. “I’m not watching the snow melt.”

“Okay,” Lou said, not believing him.

“What can I do for you?”

Lou looked out into the hallway and then sat down, speaking quickly and quietly. “Here’s the deal. I was wondering if you’d be willing to help me and Lester with something.”

“What?” Sam couldn’t help being wary. Lou’s body language made him nervous.

“We’ve got a meeting later with the President to discuss the Josh and Donna situation. To see if maybe he’ll lean on them, or even order them to do an interview and get this thing off the radar.”

Sam leaned back stunned. “Do you like working here? Because if Josh finds out about this, he’s going to fire you.”

“Not if the President agrees with us. I work for President Santos, not Josh Lyman.”

“I’ll think about it,” Sam replied flatly.

“It’s at 5:30, right before his last meeting with Josh. You know this thing will go away if they just sit down and give somebody a damn interview. I need your help on this, Sam. If we want to get anything done, we have to move past the press’s unnatural obsession with the ‘Joint Chiefs of Staff’ before somebody digs into their past and finds a scandal,” Lou said, getting up.

“Is that what you think is going to happen?” Sam turned his chair to face the chalkboard that for so long had been Josh’s. In his mind’s eye, he could still see the vote breakdowns and schedules mixed with innocent and inane notes to Josh from Donna.

“It’s what I’m hoping doesn’t happen,” Lou said. “I’ll see you at 5:30.”

Once Lou was gone, Sam kicked his chair around until he faced the window again and put his feet up on the sill. There was no way he would go into the Oval Office today and advocate the President ordering Josh to discuss his and Donna’s relationship with a reporter. Not after what Josh had said to him this morning, because Josh had a very good point. They had never spoken to the press outside of their professional capacities. The only reason the pictures and story were out there at all was because Lester had been showing off to a childhood friend. Maybe Lester ought to stand up in the press room and say some of that stuff, Sam mused. Maybe he’d go to that meeting of Lou’s and suggest it. His meeting with Ainsley shouldn’t last that long. He looked down at his watch. It was nearing 5:00 now, so if he was going to make both meetings, he should get going down to the Counsel’s office. Sam grabbed his jacket and looked out the window one last time.

“Figures,” he muttered as he saw the person he’d been watching for and hustled out of his office for the South entrance.

“Are you stalking me?” It somehow didn’t surprise Amy Gardner that Sam was waiting for her as she returned from the Hill. It had been a long, boring day of listening to senators and representatives ramble on about what they really needed was a shorter school year and how this bill was going to mean increasing teacher pay. Who was going pay for that, they wanted to know. All she could, other than make the occasional comment, was nod and take notes.

“No,” Sam stammered, because he had been and could tell that this encounter with Amy was going be as difficult as every other encounter he’d ever had with her. She was the reason he’d been staring out his window when. Baker’s confirmation had been giving him a headache, so he’d decided to ponder the education bill. Which meant waiting for Amy to get back from the Hill.

“Right,” the legislative director drawled.

“I wasn’t stalking you,” Sam repeated, following Amy as she headed into the West Wing proper. “I do need to know how your meetings on the Hill went, though, and happened to look out my window and saw you walking through the gate, so I thought I’d meet you at the door.”

“You just happened to look out your window and saw me walking through the gate?”

“Yes.”

“Sam, your desk doesn’t face the window.”

“Does it matter? How did your meetings go?” Sam vowed to remain calm. He knew getting upset with Amy would be counterproductive.

“Why do you want to know?”

Sam debated throwing out the ‘because I’m your boss’ line, but wisely let it go. “I have a meeting with Josh in a few minutes and he’s going ask me how your meetings went. I need to give him an answer.”

“I’m perfectly capable of telling Josh how my meetings went myself,” Amy snapped. “I’m a big girl, Sam.”

“Except that Josh specifically asked me to find out how your meetings went and give him the update during the sit-down he and I have later this afternoon,” Sam explained, continuing to keep his cool.

“First of all, you don’t have to talk to me like I’m three years old and secondly, if Josh can’t communicate directly with me about education reform, he shouldn’t have given it to me.”

“Josh didn’t give you education reform, Amy. He sent you up to the Hill to feel a few people out and refocus the news cycle,” Sam said, his patience finally starting to wear thin.

“And I’ll take care of telling Josh what went on up on the Hill myself,” Amy said, turning the corner into her office and brushing Sam off by closing the door in his face.

“That went about as well as could be expected,” Sam muttered. Heaving a sigh and not for the first time wondering what on earth possessed President Santos to hire Amy Gardner, Sam threaded his way through the corridors to the Counsel’s office.

“Hi, I’m Sam Seaborn,” Sam introduced himself to the woman sitting at the desk outside Ainsley’s office. “I’m here to see Ainsley Hayes.”

“Do you have an appointment?” the gray-haired woman in her late 50’s asked. She’d come to the White House with Ms. Hayes from the Heritage Foundation and was under whelmed by the young liberals who occupied the West Wing.

“Do I have an appointment?” Sam repeated, surprised by the question. “No, I don’t.”

“Then I’m sorry, Ms. Hayes has a full schedule today. I can schedule you an appointment for…” the woman flipped the pages of the schedule book in front of her until she found an opening. “Next Wednesday.”

“Perhaps you could check with Ms. Hayes and let her know I’m here. Please.” Sam continued to smile, but he put his hands on his hips and stood before her desk expectantly.

With a small huff, Ainsley’s executive assistant picked up the phone and dialed her boss’s extension. “Ms. Hayes, there’s a Mr. Seaborn here to see you. He doesn’t have an appointment and says he needs fifteen minutes of your time… Yes, ma’am.” She hung up the receiver and said to Sam. “She’ll be right out.”

The words no more than left the woman’s mouth than the door to Ainsley’s office swung open and Ainsley stepped out with a big smile. “Sam Seaborn. As I live and breathe! Come in here!”

“Ainsley, how are you?” He asked returning her smile. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed his southern Republican adversary until the sight of her filled his eyes.

“I’m good. Really good. Better than really good now that I’m not stuck at that blowhard foundation anymore. Have you ever heard the phrase ‘circle jerk’?” Ainsley rambled barely waiting for Sam to nod before continuing. “Because that’s what it was. Groupthink at its finest. No debate, no consideration of other opinions, even if they came from other conservatives. Ugh!” She stopped and looked at him. “I couldn’t do it, Sam! I’d rather work with Democrats. At least you people consider alternative points of view.”

“Glad to hear us people have some redeeming qualities. Nice office by the way.”

“Thank you. I admit, it’s no steam pipe distribution venue, but it is home.”

“It could use some Gilbert and Sullivan, though. And what’s with the appointment woman?”

Ainsley smiled at the shared memory. “Yeah, she’s a little obsessive, but she’s the most amazing researcher I’ve ever met. I had to steal her. Anyway, what can I do for you, Sam?”

“Josh wants me to work with you on the Superfund lawsuit. He thinks there are some political landmines involved.”

“Have you read through it yet?” Ainsley asked with enough sarcasm to let Sam know she had and she agreed with Josh.

“I haven’t. My fiancée is with the firm representing the plaintiffs and I figured it would be a conflict of interest for me to be involved, so when I got served with the lawsuit, I had it delivered to your office.”

“Your fiancée served you with the papers?” Ainsley raised her eyebrows and gave him a sympathetic look. “That had to hurt.”

“Yeah, well, believe it or not things actually got worse from there, but let’s not talk about Lauren. Tell me about this lawsuit.”

“The Superfund site involved is an Army depot outside Hermiston, Oregon, about three miles from the Columbia River. The Umatilla Chemical Depot has dealt with both conventional and chemical munitions over the years and the Army has traditionally taken its EPA requirements very seriously,” Ainsley explained. “Then the depot was put on the base closure list in 1988, but the Department of Defense won’t let the land be sold for private use until it’s clean.”

“Why do I have a sinking feeling I know where this is going?” Sam asked.

“Because you’re a liberal Democrat and a lawyer who believes the worst about corporations and in this case you might be justified. There’s an industrial company that wants to buy a huge tract of the land and build a biodiesel refinery there. The local residents are claiming the EPA is about to issue something called a ‘no further action’ certificate on the land even though there’s still groundwater contamination that’s polluting their rural water supply.”

“Do you think there’s any merit to it?” Sam asked.

“I have no idea.”

“How do you want to start?”

“Well, the EPA project manager was reassigned to Washington two months ago. I think we should give Justice a call and have them interview him. Nothing like a good shake down by the FBI to put the fear of God into someone.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Sam looked at Ainsley for a minute. “What are you doing now?”

“I thought I’d go tell Josh we had a plan for dealing with this lawsuit and then I’m wrapping things up and heading home. Why?” Ainsley felt her heart beat just a little faster under the intensity of Sam’s stare.

“I have to go to a meeting in the Oval Office, and I think it would be a good idea for you to come along. We can stop in to see Josh afterwards.”

CUT TO:

INT. OVAL OFFICE FOYER, SAME TIME

“Hi, Ronna,” Helen greeted her husband’s executive assistant.

“Hello, ma’am.” Ronna returned the First Lady’s smile.

“How long have we known each other, Ronna?”

“Since the President was the mayor of Houston, ma’am.”

“Can you at least call me Mrs. Santos?” Helen hated the formality of the White House, especially when it came from people like Ronna who had been with Matt for years.

“I’ll work on it, ma’am,” Ronna laughed. “He’s actually on schedule, you can go right in.”

“Thank you,” she said, letting herself into the Oval Office.

Matt looked up from his briefing material at the sound of the door opening. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I’m here on business,” said Helen, squaring her shoulders. She and Donna had spent the afternoon rehearsing this. ‘Stay calm and professional,’ she told herself.

“Business?” Matt asked.

“Yes.”

“Okay. Why don’t you sit down then?” Matt gestured at one of the loveseats. The idea of doing business with his wife put him more than a little off balance. “Do I need Josh?”

“Donna’s going to brief Josh a little later,” Helen said, sitting on the loveseat and waiting until Matt was seated as well. “You know I’ve been trying to decide on an agenda to pursue as First Lady. I’ve found an issue that’s very important to me and I think very important to women of all ages, but especially young women.”

“Okay.” The little hairs on the back of Matt’s neck pricked up. He had an idea where this might be going, and he didn’t like it.

“Do you remember yesterday we had a brief conversation about HPV and the new vaccine that’s making its way through the FDA approval process?”

“I do indeed,” Matt said, his suspicions confirmed. He thought she’d let go of that conversation a little too easily yesterday.

“I want to make shepherding this drug through its final approval my first issue as First Lady. The reason I’m here is because I know this is a very touchy subject politically, and I want to make sure if I do this, you’re willing to support me regardless of the political cost.”

“Helen…” Matt leaned back in his chair and studied his wife. He had no idea what had gotten into her. In all the years he’d been in office, she had never once expressed any interest in anything political. “Are you sure this is where you want to start? I thought you were more interested in children’s issues or helping us with education reform. The HPV vaccine? Do you realize what you could be setting yourself up for?”

“I said I knew this was a touchy political issue for you, Matt, that’s why I’m here.”

“I’m not even talking about for me. I’m talking about for you. Do you remember how worked up you got when that picture of you and your underwear was in all the papers during the campaign?”

“It was my underwear. I’m not likely to forget it was splashed all over the tabloids.”

“The people who oppose this vaccine are going to make that look like a feature story on your baking skills. Helen, they are experts at this type of thing.”

“What type of thing?” Helen’s resolve to remain calm and professional was slipping.

“Political hardball.”

“Donna thinks she has a strategy…” Helen began only to be interrupted by Matt.

“What’s your response when the press starts asking why you advocate 11-year-old girls having sex?”

“My first response is that if you don’t want your 11-year-old having sex then perhaps you ought to be doing a better job of parenting your children and my second response is why is it that only girls having sex at 11 seems to be a problem? Where exactly do you think girls get STDs from? The tooth fairy? Women of all ages should have the right to protect themselves from diseases. We have the opportunity to vaccinate women against a virus that causes cancer! Cancer, Matt! And we’re going to quibble about how old someone is when they’re allowed to get that protection? How about as soon as possible!?” Helen demanded, her face flushed.

Matt sat quietly, awed by her tirade and almost convinced that she could, with Donna Moss’s help, handle whatever her opponents threw at her. He did need to talk it over with Josh before he committed, though. “When do you need an answer?”

“I’d like to walk out of here today knowing I have your support.” Helen silently thanked God that Donna had warned her this would likely be his answer.

“My gut answer is yes, you’d have our support no matter what, but I have no idea where this drug is at in the approval process and I need to talk to Josh. I promise I’ll have an answer of some sort tonight.”

“There’s no good reason we shouldn’t be curing cancer,” Helen repeated her position, standing up to leave.

Matt walked her to the portico door and gave her a departing kiss. After she disappeared from sight, he buzzed Ronna to let her know he was ready for Lou and Lester.

“Mr. President.” His Communications Director and Press Secretary looked way too serious for the five minutes of his time they’d requested.

“What’s up, Lou?”

“I’d like to wait for…”

“Mr. President,” Sam said, breezing into the Oval Office with Ainsley Hayes right behind him. “I apologize if we’re late. Our last meeting ran a bit long.”

“No, we were just getting started. What’s going on, Lou?”

“Sir, as you know, we have a large and robust agenda we’re trying to focus on: Baker’s confirmation, the education reform bill and Kazakhstan just to name the three biggies,” Lou began.

“I’m well aware of our agenda,” Matt interrupted with a small smile.

“The thing is these are the issues we’d like the press focused on, not trivial, banal things like the relationship between your Chief of Staff and the First Lady’s Chief of Staff that seems to be dominating the media coverage of this Administration.

We’d like your assistance in convincing Josh that the best way to make this whole thing go away is for him and Donna to give an interview to a selected news outlet or two and give the press what they want so we can move ahead. And if he still refuses, I think you should consider ordering him to do it,” Lou stated her case.

“Lester? What’s your opinion?” Matt asked.

“I agree with Lou, sir. I’m tired of talking about Josh and Donna to the press,” Lester replied.

“Sam?”

The Deputy Chief of Staff took a deep breath. “I think it’s is a very bad idea. I talked to Josh about doing an interview again this morning, and he reminded me that he never once did an interview after the shooting and Donna didn’t do any after the bombing. They didn’t sell their stories to Hollywood. They chose to keep their faces out of the limelight and came back to work expecting no public recognition for being the victims of crime and terrorism. Josh didn’t want his personal life public back then, and he doesn’t want it public now. Lester, I’m sorry you’re tired of saying that, but next time, don’t leave a reporter standing in the middle of the staff without telling them she’s a reporter. These are the consequences. Deal with them.”

Lou and Lester exchanged glances and looked down at the carpet suitably chastised.

“Do you have anything to add?” the President turned to his Counsel.

Ainsley thought about it for a moment. “If it were me, the next time I was on Capital Beat that might be what I’d say.”

“I might suggest that to him later. Anything else?” Matt asked.

“No, sir,” the staffers chorused and dispersed.

“Lou?” Matt called stopping her at the door. “I know you’re trying to do your job and I was willing to hear you out this time because there were other people in the room, but never do anything like this again. If you’ve got a problem with Josh in the future, the three of us will sit down and deal with it.”

“Yes, sir.” Lou took the door out into the hallway and stalked back to her office, mentally berating herself for yet another failed attempt to get the monkey that was the ‘Joint Chiefs’ off her back. “God, what a stupid nickname.”

“Stupid nickname for what?” Otto asked as Lou passed him in the Communications bullpen.

“Don’t worry about it,” she scowled.

Otto trailed her into her office. “A bunch of us are going out for drinks after work, do you want to come along?”

“Otto,” Lou growled threateningly. “What did I tell you about…”

“Hey! I said a bunch of us. Me, Bram, Lester, Ronna. It’s not a date. Sheesh. Calm down.” The younger man turned to go.

“You know what? A drink sounds good right about now. Where are you going?”

“The Hawk and Dove.” Otto grinned at her over his shoulder and continued on his way.

FADE TO BLACK

ACT THREE

INT. JOSH’S OFFICE, EARLY EVENING

“I doubt that’s what she meant, Senator,” Josh said into the phone, feeling his blood pressure rise. “We’re only taking the temperature of the caucus. We aren’t making any moves right now.”

Margaret stuck her head in the door. “Sam and Ainsley Hayes are here to see you.”

Josh nodded his acquiescence and raised an eyebrow as he watched Sam close both doors to his office while he finished his phone call. “Senator, I’ve got a meeting, but I hear what you’re saying and we’ll keep an eye on it. Please tell Sassy I said hello.” He hung up the phone and looked at his visitors. “What’s up?”

“We’ve come up with an action plan on the lawsuit,” Sam replied.

“Why do I have a bad feeling about this?”

“Because you, like Sam, have an inherent distrust of all things Republican and Southern and I am both.” Ainsley smiled sweetly.

“Probably,” Josh chuckled. “Sit and give it to me.”

“Have you read the suit?” asked Sam, almost immediately realizing it was a stupid question. Of course Josh had read the paperwork. “Never mind…”

“The guy who was in charge of the project for the EPA for about 10 years was recently transferred back to D.C.,” Ainsley said, taking control of the conversation.

“How recently?”

“Two months ago.”

“Why was he transferred?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t quite gotten anyone at EPA to admit that,” Ainsley said. “And they’re dragging their feet on sending me the paperwork I asked for.”

“So what’s the plan?”

“We want to have the FBI call this guy in for questioning,” Sam said.

“For two reasons,” Ainsley picked up the ball. “If there’s nothing going on out there and his transfer back here was routine because the work was actually done, then he’ll be able to tell us that up front. Or if his transfer wasn’t routine or he feels the work wasn’t done, he’ll tell us that instead. Then we’ve put the fear of God into whomever at EPA is behind this by having the FBI drop in on this guy at work.”

Josh nodded. “Sounds like a start. I’ll give Mike Casper a call in the morning and have him coordinate with the two of you. Ainsley, anything else going on in the Counsel’s office I should know about?”

“We’re leaking like a sieve down there, if that’s what you’re asking,” Ainsley joked, deciding not to mention the meeting in the Oval Office she and Sam had just attended.

“Go do something, you know, important,” Josh laughed and shook his head. He waited until Ainsley left before focusing on his deputy. “If she weren’t such a damn good lawyer, the craziness factor there would be a serious detriment to her getting hired, well, anywhere.”

Sam laughed. “Speaking of women who might be lunatics.”

“Let me guess, our esteemed legislative director?” Josh groaned, remembering the topic of his conversation with Senator McBain.

“She is convinced you gave her education reform,” Sam said.

“One trip to the Hill means she’s spear-heading education reform?” Josh rubbed his hands over his face. “What did she find out up there by the way?”

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? Didn’t I tell you to sit down with her when she got back?”

“I tried, but she refused to tell me.”

“She refused to tell you?”

“She said you gave her education reform and she’d report directly to you.”

“Oh God.”

“Yeah.”

“That part where I told you to keep her under control…”

“No, you told me to sit down with her when she got back and map out some strategy,” Sam clarified. “How do you want me to handle that when she’s convinced that she’s reporting directly to you?”

Josh pursed his lips, slightly annoyed that Sam wasn’t going after Amy any harder. “I’ll take care of it. Anything else going on today that I should know about?”

“We’re making slow progress on Baker, but the pardon thing is a tough hurdle. That one of his is going to look like cronyism, there’s no way around that. And the Toby thing, I’m hearing that they don’t care about the astronauts. The Judiciary chair is making noise about trotting out a couple of guys who say they know the risks and they go on every mission prepared to die. Nobody wants to admit it’s a constitutional power of the executive. They just want to go on about being tough on crime or national security or whatever.” Josh nodded his understanding and Sam looked down at his notes. “That’s all I’ve got.”

“Nice work on the lawsuit.”

“Most of that was Ainsley. I’m just along for the ride.” Sam stood up.

“Wrap things up and get out of here, then.”

“You, too.”

Josh mumbled a response, but he had little intention of going home early to an empty apartment. Gathering his notes together he headed into the Oval Office for his final scheduled meeting of the day with the President.

“Good evening, sir,” Josh announced himself.

“I suppose that depends on your definition of good.” Between the First Lady’s visit and his meeting with Lou, Lester, Sam and Ainsley, the President was in a mood and he wasn’t looking forward to having this conversation with his Chief of Staff. He was starting to have second thoughts about his support for his wife’s first issue and he figured Josh would want the East Wing as far away from this fight as possible.

“We didn’t have to invade any foreign countries today,” Josh pointed out. “And no states seceded from the Union.”

“Well, if those are your standards…”

“Most days I try to aim low, sir. It makes clearing the bar easier.”

Matt couldn’t help smiling. The way Josh worked to keep him in a good mood unless bad things were actually happening was one of the things he was coming to value about his Chief of Staff. “Did Donna talk to you?”

“No, sir,” Josh looked at Matt in askance. “About what?”

“Helen’s picked an issue. She came down here this afternoon to talk to me about it.”

Matt’s question from earlier in the day rose in Josh’s mind. “Let me guess. The HPV vaccine?”

“Yep.”

“What do you think, sir?” Josh asked. He was somewhat surprised that his response this evening wasn’t much different than his response had been that morning ­ it didn’t set off any alarms with him. The vaccine prevented cancer and as long as that was the focus of any campaign, anyone who opposed it was going to look pretty hateful.

“I think Helen’s a political neophyte and the chances of her getting her ass handed to her are pretty great,” Matt sighed.

“Your wife might be new at this, sir, but her team is extremely experienced and highly competent. I doubt Donna would have sent her down here to talk to you if she didn’t have the beginnings of a strategy already mapped out. What did Mrs. Santos say when you talked?” Josh was curious about how Donna would have Helen approach Matt.

Matt gave his Chief of Staff a rundown of Helen’s outburst and was surprised to see the smirk on Josh’s face. “What?”

“She made an appointment and came down here, sir?”

The President nodded.

“She wasn’t asking your permission to do this, sir. It doesn’t matter what we think, this is the issue they’ve chosen to work on and we’re going to need to work with them to minimize any political fallout, but if she sticks to the message she delivered in this office, I think we’ll be fine. Curing cancer is a good thing, Mr. President, and if they want to cut their teeth on something that’s a guaranteed win, I say let them.”

“You think the HPV vaccine is a guaranteed win?” Matt was shocked to hear that. He thought Josh would be worried about a great outcry from the family values sect about the age recommendations and how vaccinating girls against an STD encouraged them to have premarital sex.

“The drug works, and it’s going to be approved by the FDA in the very near future. The only battle to be fought here is a PR level and I’m pretty sure what you heard today was a trial run of the message the East Wing plans to put out. They’re going to focus on the fact that the drug prevents cancer. I might encourage Donna and Annabeth to mention that the FDA approval process has always been and should continue to be apolitical, but that’s a message for a select audience,” Josh thought aloud. “Sir, there’s nothing here but a positive learning experience. Donna’s damn good at this. She’s not going to let Mrs. Santos make any missteps. Let them have it. It costs us nothing. We’ve got other issues to focus on.”

“Like Kazakhstan,” Matt agreed.

“Kazakhstan and education reform and the Baker confirmation,” Josh ticked off. “Plus we’ve got a budget to start negotiating.”

“Didn’t we just get elected?” It came out as a groan. As a congressman, Matt had hated the budget process because it never seemed to end.

“We did and if we start now, we might have a spending bill ready when the government runs out of money in October.”

“You think about that, I’m going to think about what the chef made for dinner as I walk up to the Residence.” Matt started stuffing his reports into his briefcase. He preferred to leave the office around 6 o’clock if possible, but he took hours of reading materials upstairs with him to prepare for the next day’s meetings and he wasn’t above returning to the office if the day’s schedule demanded it.

Josh waited quietly while the President prepared to leave, contemplating his own pile of evening reading. He was going to have to have words with the staff about their verbosity. Brevity was something he was coming to appreciate.

“By the way, when are you and Donna going to throw the press a bone so we can get that issue off the table? Don’t think I didn’t see that topic of debate on every Sunday morning show again this week.” Matt asked, interrupting Josh’s musings.

“Donna and I are not a story, sir,” Josh replied with his standard line.

“It would kill you to sit down with Larry King for an hour?”

“Not kill me, sir, but I might break out in hives if I had to appear on Larry King and talk about my personal life.”

“Yeah,” Matt watched Josh struggle to maintain his jovial attitude in the face of the gentle badgering and made a quick decision. “Do we have someone scheduled to do Capital Beat this week yet?”

Josh shook his head. “No, it’s Monday. The booker usually doesn’t call until Tuesday or Wednesday. Why?”

“I have a suggestion for you. I think you should take this week’s topic and you should give them one question about you and Donna…” Matt held up his hand to forestall the interruption but it did no good.

“Absolutely not, sir,” Josh interrupted, his jaw tightening and his lips thinning.

“And,” Matt continued unperturbed. “I think you should tell them exactly what you told Sam this morning about why your personal life is nobody’s business.”

Josh cocked his head to the side. “How do you know what I told Sam this morning, sir?”

“Lou got it in her head that I should order you to do an interview to end this thing, and she recruited Sam for support. Imagine her surprise when he came in here and said it was a horrible idea.”

“Sam said that?” Josh’s initial surge of anger at Lou dissipated at the realization he’d swayed Sam with his argument.

“You look as surprised as Lou did,” Matt chuckled.

“Sam spent five minutes this morning trying to convince me to go the interview route.”

“And whatever it was you said convinced him that you’re right and everyone else is wrong. So I’m giving you my permission to go on TV and tell everyone to back off. You aren’t an elected official or a movie star or a publicity-seeking debutante. You have the right to conduct your private life in private,” Matt said.

Josh stood silently for a long moment digesting what he was being told. “If I do this, that’s the end of it?” he asked. “Nothing more from anyone about how we should do this interview or that interview?”

Matt nodded. “You aren’t without your share of supporters on the pundit circuit, Josh. Get out there and give them something to work with.”

“Let me talk to Donna about it, sir.” Josh ceded, his body language telling the President that barring any objection from Donna it was a done deal.

“I’m heading upstairs to dinner then. You should head on home.”

“Have a good night, sir.”

Josh waited until Matt disappeared onto the portico before he returned to his office and dismissed Margaret for the night. He had no desire to go home alone. He planned to stay late and catch up on his briefing materials. Grabbing several of them off the stack, he flopped down on the sofa, pulled his tie down and kicked his shoes off.

A knock at his door grabbed his attention before he got past the first summary page.

“Got a minute?” Donna asked.

“Sure, what’s up?” He put the report down on his lap and tried to appear nonchalant even as his insides squirmed. He hadn’t spoken with Donna since he’d helped her move her things out of his apartment the day before. She’d left messages on his answering machine and his voicemail asking him to please stop avoiding her and pick up the phone, but Josh just couldn’t shake the feeling that Donna was making some kind of statement about their relationship by moving out. A very negative statement and he was very much afraid of what she wanted to say

Donna sat across from Josh and noted that he looked like hell. Part of her wanted to ask if he’d slept the night before, but another larger, part was still annoyed at him for not returning her phone calls. “The First Lady has decided on an issue.”

“I heard.”

“And?”

“And what?” Josh asked. He wasn’t sure what she wanted, other than the formality of the conversation.

“What do you think?”

“I’ll tell you the same thing I told the President: if the First Lady wants to cut her teeth on a guaranteed win, that’s fine.”

“You think it’s a guaranteed win?” Donna was surprised. She was anticipating a PR war with the family values and religious right groups.

“I think if you frame it as cancer prevention, it’s a guaranteed win,” Josh repeated his position. “If you could do me the favor of mentioning that the FDA process is supposed to be entirely non-political every once in a while that would be great.”

“The First Lady wants to push this hard. If we aggravate a few people, that’s not going to be a problem?” Donna lifted an eyebrow.

“I'll never know until you aggravate them, but you know who we can afford to alienate and who we can’t. I trust you.”

Donna smiled at the compliment. “Thank you.”

“I told the President that between you and Annabeth, Helen would be fine.”

“I thought Mrs. Santos said he was on board,” Donna looked at Josh questioningly.

“Between the time they talked and the end of the day, he started to get a little squirrelly. He’s worried about the extremists playing hardball with her.”

“If we lock the discussion in around it being a cure for cancer and refuse to discuss any of the other stuff, they’re going to come off looking out of the mainstream,” Donna interrupted.

“That’s what I said,” Josh agreed.

“And if we have to talk about the sex thing, we’re going to say that sex education is the parents’ responsibility. If you don’t want your child to have sex, you need communicate your values to your child,” she finished.

“Sounds like a solid strategy.”

“I think so.”

“Where are you going to start?”

“Annabeth is working on that, but either she or I might hit Capital Beat. Get the First Lady involved with the public service announcements the FDA is doing, speeches at women’s health clinics, stuff like that.”

“Keep me posted?” Josh asked. He knew they had no obligation to, but he didn’t have any desire to get blindsided by anything.

“Sure. Do you want Annabeth to coordinate with Lou? She was over today by the way, reminding us to let you guys know if we’re planning on leaking anything. What’s going on with that?”

“We had some internal conversations wind up in editorials in the Washington Post yesterday,” Josh admitted. “Don’t worry about Lou. We don’t need blow-by-blows. You know the deal.”

“Okay,” Donna nodded, standing up to go. “What are you doing tonight?” she asked as she opened the door that exited to the hallway.

“Working,” Josh replied, holding up the report in his lap. As easy as their professional conversation had been, his personal emotions were still a mess. The reports were just his excuse for hiding in the West Wing. He wanted to get his thoughts in order in a place that didn’t pulse with Donna’s presence.

“I thought maybe we could get dinner,” Donna offered.

“I’m behind on my briefing books for tomorrow. I need to stay until I get caught up.”

“You could take them home.”

“I’m going to be late tonight, Donna. Maybe another night.”

Donna shook her head, frustrated that he was going to continue to avoid talking to her. “Fine. When you’re ready to talk to me, you know where to find me.”

Josh watched her walk out the door and nearly got up and ran after her, but stopped himself. Anything he said right now would be wrong. He would either lose his temper and say horrible, hurtful things he would be unable to take back or he would grovel and he wouldn’t be able to articulate the hurt she’d caused him by moving out.

This was the real reason he was staying late, immersing himself in work. He had discovered over the years that the mind-numbing repetition of report reading allowed the subconscious parts of his brain to wander, and he frequently found solutions to the strangest problems while reading briefing materials. He was hoping tonight’s solution would be the answer to the mess with Donna.

CUT TO:

INT. DONNA’S OFFICE, 10 MINUTES LATER

“How did it go with Josh?” Annabeth pounced the minute Donna walked in the door. The prospect of doing actual work had the First Lady’s press secretary salivating.

“He’s all for it.”

“You know, for someone who was pushing so hard for Mrs. Santos to pick an issue, you sure don’t sound very excited that she finally has.”

Donna shook her head. “It’s got nothing to do with Mrs. Santos.”

“All’s not well in Camelot?” Annabeth asked sympathetically. She’d figured as much since their discussion that morning.

“He’s just been so… him since I moved back into my apartment yesterday,” Donna said. She sat down in her chair and buried her face in her hands. “He won’t talk to me unless it’s work related. He’s not returning my phone calls. I asked him to go out to dinner tonight and he hid behind work.”

Annabeth whistled softly and tried to explain what was obvious to a third party. “Donna, honey, you moved out after living with him for four months. There’s only one way a man is going to interpret that. He’s probably not returning your phone calls because he’s afraid you’re going to break up with him.”

Donna lifted her head and stared at Annabeth. “My living with him was never permanent. I moved out because I couldn’t afford to keep that apartment and not live in it.”

“Honey, trust me, all that man heard was ‘I’m moving out’ which translated roughly into ‘I’m breaking up with you soon’.”

“I am not breaking up with him!” Donna threw her hands up, exasperated at the entire situation. “I told him a week a head of time that this was going to happen.”

“Do you want my advice?” Annabeth offered cheekily.

Donna glared at the perky blonde who just smiled back, oblivious to her boss’s warning look, and continued anyway. “You two have been under a lot of pressure since this thing started, Donna. You guys are both taking your communication for granted. You presume he’s hearing what you’re saying and he’s presuming you’re saying what he’s hearing and that’s not necessarily what’s going on. Don’t forget this is the guy who sent you the bouquet of the world’s biggest sunflowers for Valentine’s Day. Just think about what I’m saying.”

Tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, Donna sighed. “All right, I’ll think about it.”

“And if you change your mind, a friend of mine sold her condo and bought a house, but the closing got pushed back almost four months, so she’s looking for a place until then.” Annabeth gathered her things. “I’m going to head home. You should do the same.”

Donna heaved another huge sigh once Annabeth was gone. She knew the woman had a point, but it didn’t change the fact she was tired of people giving her advice on how to handle her relationship with Josh. That was the worst part of this whole thing, how everyone seemed to think they knew what was best for her and Josh. Outside of Sam and Annabeth, none of the people on this staff had knew them very well. How could they presume to know what was best for people they’d known so briefly? Had they been through everything she and Josh had? No. They didn’t even care, they just wanted it over with and out of their lives, regardless of what it did to her and Josh’s relationship.

FADE TO BLACK

ACT FOUR

INT. THE HAWK & DOVE, EVENING

“Here’s my question, what if someone said something to a reporter not knowing they were a reporter?” Bram asked Otto as they leaned up against the bar waiting for their drinks.

“What are you talking about?”

“Lou’s email today. About leaks to reporters having to be cleared. What if you were at a bar, having a random conversation with a woman and it wasn’t until way into it that you found out she was a reporter and she wouldn’t commit to the previous part of the conversation being off the record,” Bram expounded on his question.

Otto shook his head in confusion. “I think you should talk to Sam.”

“But that’s the thing. I don’t want to talk to Sam unless I have to because I don’t know if it was me. I don’t remember saying any of that stuff to her. In fact, I doubt I ever knew any of that stuff, but I did talk to a reporter.”

“Then don’t tell Sam.” Otto rolled his eyes and accepted his beer. “But stop talking about this before Lou gets here, okay? I don’t feel the need to get yelled at tonight and she’s in a bad enough mood over the whole thing with Josh and Donna and the press.”

“I don’t get why they just don’t do an interview,” Bram said following Otto to an empty table. They were the first ones to arrive.

“I can’t say I’d be in any hurry to talk about my love life with the press,” Otto shrugged.

“How long do you think it’s been going on? I’ve heard rumors that they’ve actually been together since the first Bartlet campaign.”

“Don’t believe everything you read on Drudge,” Lou growled as she, Ronna and Lester arrived in time to hear Bram’s last rumination. “I know for a fact they weren’t even speaking when I hired Donna.”

“I know for a fact he refused to hire Donna,” Ronna commented. “That was brutal. Poor girl was in tears when she left the office after the interview.”

“Are we going to talk about work all night?” Lester asked.

“You’re right. We should talk about something else,” Lou agreed.

An awkward silence descended on the table in the wake of her pronouncement as the five of them traded glances, each waiting for the others to start a non-work related conversation.

“I’d put money on election night,” Ronna said, restarting the conversation.

“Me, too,” Lou chimed in.

“Probably,” agreed Lester.

CUT TO:

INT. SAM & LAUREN’S APT., EVENING

Sam let himself into the apartment he and Lauren shared and dropped his keys in the basket by the door. “I’m home!”

“Hey!” Lauren smiled, coming out of the bedroom with her skirt unzipped and her blouse half unbuttoned.

“Just get home?”

“Yeah. I stopped and picked up some take-out.” She nodded toward the kitchen. “I hoped you’d be home at a reasonable hour.”

“It was a relatively calm day.” Sam kissed her on his way into the bedroom to change his own clothes. “Some minor brush fires, but nothing major.”

“Oh?” Lauren knew Sam had been worried about how Josh would react to finding out about her inadvertent leak.

“He had it figured out before I could tell him,” Sam said, knowing what Lauren was referring to. “I’m being punished, however.”

Lauren raised her eyebrows as she sat down on the bed to pull her pantyhose off. “Josh is punishing you because I didn’t realize the senior partner’s daughter was a reporter for the Washington Post?”

“No, Josh is punishing me for talking to you too much about things that I shouldn’t be talking to you about at all,” Sam clarified.

“So now you can’t talk to me about work?”

“That’s not what I said.” Sam rubbed his eyes. “Look, Lauren, there are things at work that I can talk about and things I can’t. That’s the way it is. This is my fault. I never should have put you in a position to know things you shouldn’t.”

“That’s it then? You have a crappy day at work because you have to help the President make the decision to assassinate someone and I can’t help you through it because you can’t tell me about it because I’m not trusted to keep my mouth shut?” Lauren sounded hurt.

“That’s not fair. There are plenty of things you can’t tell me because of attorney-client privilege,” Sam pointed out, pulling off his socks.

“I know,” Lauren sighed. She sat down on the bed next to him. “Just let me know what we’ve already talked about that I shouldn’t let on that I know about.”

“Probably want to start with the Superfund lawsuit,” Sam frowned. “In fact, it would probably be best if you didn’t bring anything related to it into the apartment.”

“Why?”

“I’ve been assigned to assist the White House Counsel in disposing of the suit,” Sam answered.

“Please tell me you’re kidding?”

Sam shook his head.

“Isn’t that a conflict of interest for you?”

“As Josh pointed out, no more than it is for you. Plus, I’m not litigating it. I’m along to handle any political implications.”

Lauren wrapped her arms around Sam. “I’m starting to think moving here was a bad idea.”

“It’ll be okay, baby, I promise.” Sam murmured, burrowing his face into Lauren’s neck.

CUT TO:

INT. DONNA’S APT., LATE NIGHT

“Coming!” Donna called. She had no idea who would be pounding on her door at one o’clock in the morning, but once she got done fumbling with the locks, she was certainly going to give whoever it was a piece of her mind. Especially if it was the drunken friends of the guy down the hall. They’d pounded on her door the night before as well, thinking it was his. Finally, throwing the door open as far as the chain guard allowed she saw one of Josh’s Secret Service agents and bit back her tirade. “Rodney.”

“Ms. Moss. May I come in?”

Donna closed the door, unhooked the chain and let the agent in. Opening the door, she saw Josh leaning against the hallway with his hands shoved in his pockets, waiting. The shoulders of his overcoat were damp, telling her it had started to rain or snow since she’d been home.

Despite her desire to have this conversation and clear up the misunderstanding between them, faced with the prospect of actually having it, Donna was suddenly nervous.

“It’s clear,” Rodney said leaving the apartment and taking up a post outside the door.

“Hi,” Donna whispered, hugging herself against the chill in the hallway.

“Mr. Lyman, could you please step inside?” the agent interrupted before Josh could respond.

“She hasn’t invited me in,” Josh pointed out.

“Ms. Moss, would you please invite Mr. Lyman inside? We haven’t done a complete security shakedown of this building because we didn’t know either of you was going to be spending significant time here.”

“Come in,” Donna said, turning and ushering Josh into her apartment and then closing the door behind them.

“I want to know what I did,” Josh said softly. “I’ve been racking my brain since Sunday morning trying to figure out what it is I did or said or forgot so that I don’t do it again, and I can’t come up with anything that would be so bad that you would want to move out. So here I am, asking. What did I do?”

Donna rubbed her arms and sat down on the sofa. She spoke softly, but clearly “You didn’t do anything. I just needed to move back here. I explained the rent situation to you, Josh. Why are you making this bigger than it is?”

“Because I don’t understand what’s going on,” Josh replied. “I was happy the way we were and I thought you were happy too. And then you moved out. Which seems to indicate you aren’t happy. Donna, this thing isn’t going to work if you and I live halfway across town from each other. Not with our schedules.” Josh swallowed hard. He didn’t really want to ask the next question, but he had to know. “Is that what you’re trying to tell me? That you aren’t happy with me anymore?”

“We could make it work if we tried,” Donna shrugged. The veneer of her surface excuse was peeling away. “We could set up a schedule of whose place we stay at which day.”

“Think about our days, Donna,” Josh pleaded. “I leave for the office at 6 o’clock in the morning, and I’m lucky to get home by 8 o’clock at night . I bring work home with me. I want to spend some of that precious time with you, and the last thing I want to worry about is whose apartment I’m going to and whether I’ve got clean underwear there for the next day. Why is it so important to you that you live here? Help me understand.”

Donna looked up at Josh, his confusion written all over his face and realized just how right Annabeth had been that afternoon. She was expecting him to hear what she was saying without ever uttering the words.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Donna burst out, collapsed against the back of the sofa. “I’m tired of being on magazine covers and being talked about on the Sunday shows and discussed at the water cooler. I just want to live my life and I thought if I moved out, the media would take that as a hint that maybe they were reading more into it than was there and go away and then we could pick back up…”

Donna trailed off at the look of hurt and disbelief on Josh’s face.

“You moved out because of the… the…” Josh waved his arm at the window unable to even articulate the word ‘media.’ “I thought we agreed we weren’t going to let them in? That if we did, this is what would happen!”

Donna reached out and grabbed Josh’s hand, pulling him closer to her, surprising him slightly, but comforting him, too, with her desire to be near him. “It’s already happened, Josh. It’s all I hear about from people all day long and I know it’s the same for you.”

“It is, and I’m tired of talking about it with people who barely know us, but that’s not what bothers me the most.” He kneeled down in front of her and looked her in the eyes. “What kills me is that we were so sick of it we can’t even talk to each other. I mean, we had those first conversations when we decided we weren’t going to do an interview, but then that was it. I never told you how violated I felt to see those pictures of us on that magazine cover or how bad I felt that I couldn’t take you out to dinner on Valentine’s Day…”

“I know I should have told you how I was feeling. I just thought maybe my moving out because of the rent thing wouldn’t upset you so much. I never thought you’d think I was breaking up with you.” Donna leaned forward and rested her head against Josh’s shoulder, seeking shelter in his arms. “I thought we were getting better with the communicating thing.”

“We need to stop protecting each other from what we’re feeling. It only made things worse here. This whole stupid misunderstanding could have been avoided if we had just talked to each other,” Josh said, caressing Donna’s back.

“I love you so much,” Donna whispered in his ear.

“I love you too, and that’s all that matters. I don’t even care what anybody says or prints or screams from the television anymore. I don’t care about Lou or Lester or Annabeth. I care about you.” He pulled back and brushed the wetness from the corner of her eye. “And the President gave me an idea tonight of a way to shut everybody up and I think it’ll work.”

“What is it?” Donna asked, cupping his face with her hands. She was ready to try anything short of an interview to get this media monkey off their backs.

“If you agree, I’m going to do Capital Beat this week and I’m going to take one question about us and my response is going to be how our private life is private and it’s nobody’s business.”

Donna smiled, remembering the rant she had heard Josh deliver to the television set on more than one occasion. The rant that convinced her he was right on the issue. “I’ll agree on one condition.”

“What’s that?” Josh asked, relieved she was willing to go along with the idea.

“I get to go along and talk about the HPV vaccine.”

DISSOLVE TO:

DONNA’S OFFICE, MORNING

“My aren’t we perky this morning,” Annabeth grinned at Donna like a Cheshire cat. As obviously down as the woman had been yesterday, she was equally happy today. “Much improved from yesterday.”

Donna blushed but didn’t say anything.

“That’s okay, you don’t have to say anything. You’ve got make-up sex written all over your face.” Annabeth teased.

“There was no make-up sex because he showed up at one o’clock in the morning!” Donna hissed, trying to look scandalized. “But, yes, nosy Nelly, we did get things worked out.”

“And?”

“And why don’t you give your friend my number. I’m looking for someone to sublet my apartment until the lease is up. We’ve got a meeting with the First Lady in fifteen minutes,” Donna said, sweeping into her office.

CUT TO:

INT. OPS BULLPEN, MORNING

Bram dumped his briefcase on his desk and strode through the corridors trying to look more confident than he felt. Otto had convinced him that he needed to talk to Sam about his drunken conversation with the intern from the Post over the weekend. If Lou found out before Sam did, Bram was dead meat, Otto had advised. Sam was a guy, he’d understand.

“Is Sam here?” Bram asked Ginger.

“He just headed to Communications. If you run you can catch him before the morning staff meeting.”

Bram hesitated for half a second and then took off at a trot. “Sam!”

“What’s up?” Sam asked without breaking his stride.

“Can I talk to you for a second?” Bram asked.

“Walk with me. I’ve got staff in like two minutes.”

“I kind of wanted to do this in private.”

“This is as private as it’s going to be all day,” Sam replied, but he did slow his pace.

Bram put his hand on Sam’s shoulder effectively stopping him before they reached the communications bullpen.

“I got Lou’s email about the leaks in the media and here’s the thing, I was out at a bar on Saturday night and I met this girl and the night was almost over before I found out she was an intern for the Post. I cannot for the life of me remember half of what we talked about,” he said in an urgent whisper.

Sam stared at the young man for a heartbeat and then started to laugh. “Is this what you were obsessing over all day yesterday?”

“Well, yeah,” Bram shrugged one shoulder, surprised that Sam was laughing.

“Bram, you weren’t the leak, although as your boss, I’d advise you to make your second question to women ‘so what do you do’ from here on out.”

“I wasn’t the leak?”

“No, you weren’t.” Sam started walking again.

“How do you know?” Bram called.

Sam turned around and gave his young staffer an amused glance before tossing the man’s earlier words back at him with a laugh. “Because, Bram, you’re nothing but an anonymous cog in the system. Don’t you remember? Nobody wants to talk to you.”

PAN TO:

INT. COMMUNICATIONS BULLPEN, CONTINUOUS

“How’s your head?” Otto asked Lou as they exited their offices and followed Sam on his way to the senior staff meeting.

“I am getting way too old to drink like that,” Lou muttered.

“You aren’t the only one,” Lester groaned, falling into step.

“You know we’re going to get held after class today, right?” Lou shot a quick glance at Lester.

“Why do you think I drank so much last night? I figured it’d be the last night I saw freedom until the second term.”

“You still think we did the right thing, right?” Lou asked. “Don’t bail on me now, Lester.”

“Sam and the President both had very good points yesterday, Lou,” Lester replied. “But I’m not backing out on you now.”

Otto spun around and looked at his two friends. “I don’t even want to know what you two did.” He walked backwards for a couple of steps before turning again and flashing a smile at Margaret. “Good morning, Margaret.”

“Good morning, Otto.” The taciturn redhead returned his smile, but scowled at Lou and Lester. “Josh is waiting.”

A significant part of Margaret’s initial trepidation at working for Josh had been how much he reminded her of Leo, but she found it also engendered in her a loyalty she couldn’t shake. She had heard, because the White House walls had ears and the carpets spoke, what had gone on in the Oval Office yesterday and was already plotting her own form of revenge on Josh’s behalf.

Josh was sitting behind his desk, leaning back in his chair. Once everyone was present, he let the chair fall forward. “I’m going to make this one quick because we’ve all got work to do today. Sam, I called Mike Casper this morning, he’s going to coordinate with you and the Counsel’s office on the FBI interview of the EPA guy. Make sure you give the Attorney General a head’s up and when it’s over, brief Lou and Lester in case they start getting questions. Keep pounding Baker’s confirmation.”

“Got it,” Sam replied.

“Amy, go back up to the Hill and do the same thing you did yesterday except this time report to Sam when you get back.” Josh locked eyes with the legislative director until she nodded. Satisfied she understood, he continued. “Lou, Otto, the President has that speech to the National Association of Special Education Teachers next week. That gives us a major opportunity for an education speech. I want to see the draft by the end of the week.”

“Not a problem,” Otto volunteered. “I’ve already started.”

“Lester, we’re beginning talks with key legislators about education reform and OMB is starting to put together our budget projections for the next fiscal year and we look forward to working with the House of Representatives in passing a budget.”

“The budget? It’s barely March.” Lester looked up from his notes questioningly.

“And we’re about to ask them for a lot of money to finance an excursion in Kazakhstan that we didn’t ask for and an education reform package that we did. It’s never too early to start dropping hints,” Josh said. “Does anyone have any questions?”

The group shook their heads.

“Amy, Otto and Sam, you’re excused. Lou and Lester and I have some things to talk about. Lou, would you close the doors, please?”

Lou did as she was asked and then turned to face Josh, her resolve firm. “Look, Josh, you can be as pissed off at me as you want to be, but I am the Communications Director of this Administration and it’s my job to get and keep us on message. Something that’s proven absolutely impossible since you decided to make out with your girlfriend in front of God and everyone on inauguration night. So I did my job, I went to the supervisor of the person who’s the problem. I went to the President about you.”

“Do you get that this isn’t just about me and Donna?” Josh let the last part of her statement go. The President had already addressed it with her and Josh had a more important issue to address. “If we sit down and do some in-depth Barbara Walters interview, do you get that the precedent is set? That any relationship any White House staffer ever has is fair game? So tell me, just who will you and Otto be picking to do your interview with when it comes out how hot and heavy you two were during the campaign? Lester? You and Edie?”

“Those relationships were both casual and are both over,” Lou couldn’t believe Josh would stoop to bringing up campaign trail dalliances.

“All it would take is a hotel worker in Houston getting paid $50,000 by the opposition to tell her story about what she saw on the night before the election and a stringer photographer to take a couple of pictures the next time you’re out at the bar as a group. Don’t believe me? Ask Sam about Laurie the call girl/law student friend of his. I’m sure you remember that one, don’t you Lou? You were working in D.C. back then weren’t you?”

Lou swallowed hard, remembering the gloating amongst her Republican friends and colleagues at the predicament the in which White House had found itself. In that moment the dime dropped and Josh’s stubbornness had a purpose.

“Yeah. Yeah, I do.” She nodded.

“That’s why the White House doesn’t comment on the personal lives of the staff and that’s why Donna and I are refusing to do a tell-all interview. I’m sorry this is making your life a little bit difficult right now, Lester, but there is a reason for it. You two have got to trust that I know what I’m doing. I cannot be fighting the staff and the Hill. We will get nothing accomplished. Understood?”

“Understood,” Lester said while Lou continued nodding.

“One more thing, Lou…”

CUT TO:

INT. CAPITAL BEAT SET, THURSDAY, EARLY EVENING

“I’m serious about this, Mark. One question,” Josh threatened the show’s host as Donna put her microphone on and settled in the chair next to him. “If I were you, I’d save it for the end of the show.”

“This is the end of the show. We’ve got three minutes coming back. We’ll do the HPV vaccine and then the question.” Mark Gottfried said. He was scribbling notes on his scripts, but he didn’t miss the quick hand squeeze that passed between his two guests.

“We’re back in 10!” called the floor director.

“Welcome back to Capital Beat,” Mark’s face lit up the minute the ON AIR light came on in the studio. “We’ve been talking with the President’s chief of staff, Josh Lyman, and joining us is Donna Moss, the First Lady’s chief of staff.” Mark smiled at Donna who beamed back at him. “Welcome, Donna.”

“Thank you, Mark.”

“The FDA is rumored to be on the verge of approving a new vaccine for the HPV virus. HPV is a sexual transmitted disease that causes genital warts in both sexes and in women can lead to cervical cancer. Now the manufacturer recommends vaccinations for girls as young as ten. What’s the White House’s position on that?” Mark asked Josh.

“Let’s be clear on something here, Mark,” Donna leaned forward slightly, surprising him by taking the question. “HPV is a necessary factor in nearly all cases of cervical cancer. In other words, if you don’t have HPV, you aren’t going to get cervical cancer. A vaccine for the underlying cause of a cancer has been developed. Why is this even a discussion?”

“There are people out there who say vaccinating young girls against an STD is giving them a license to have sex outside of marriage,” Mark threw the standard contrary talking point out.

“Sex education starts in the home with the parents. If you don’t want your child having sex before marriage, you need to be educating and communicating with your child effectively to make sure they remain abstinent. And just because they’re abstinent doesn’t mean their eventual partner will have been. Young women should have the ability to protect themselves from a common virus that causes cancer, even after marriage,” Donna concluded. “They shouldn’t be given a possible death sentence because of someone else’s indiscretions.”

“Fair enough,” Mark smiled. He was absolutely giddy with anticipation. He had bided his time through the entire show for this brief conversation they were about to have. “Before we started the show, you both agreed that I would be allowed the chance to do something no other reporter has had an opportunity to do and that is to ask you two about your relationship. This thing has exploded since the inauguration. Is this the reaction you expected?”

Josh took a deep breath and glanced at Donna who gave him an encouraging smile. “No, Mark, it’s not the reaction we expected at all, because we never expected to be the object of this kind of media frenzy. Donna and I are private citizens. We have never sought publicity for ourselves. Even after the events so gloriously detailed in Ms. Washington’s article, neither Donna nor I did interviews or wrote books or sold our stories to Hollywood. Our lives aren’t a reality show that the media has some God given right to pry into and devour and spit out when it’s done. The only times you’ve ever seen us on television have been in the furtherance of our professional causes. In over 20 years of public service, I can say this is the first time I have ever spoken about my personal life in a public forum and I can tell you it will be the last.”

“Donna, anything to add?”

“Only that I would think the media would have more important issues to devote air time and column inches to than to Josh and I. Perhaps to issues such as education reform and the HPV vaccine, welfare reform and local issues that are the most important to individual communities,” Donna said.

“Okay, that’s all the time we have for tonight. I’m Mark Gottfried. Our guests have been Josh Lyman and Donna Moss. Thank you both for your time. Thank you for watching Capital Beat.”

“And we’re clear,” called the floor director.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. JOSH’S CAR, 10 MINUTES LATER

“I hate TV make-up,” Donna griped, collapsing into the backseat of the Town Car the Secret Service provided Josh. “It makes me look orange.”

“Excellent answer on the HPV question. You knocked it out of the ballpark.” Josh draped his arm around her shoulders and kissed her cheek.

“Thank you. The same to you. I thought Mark was going to reach over the table and strangle you for that answer though. Do you think it’ll work?”

“We’ll find out.” Josh leaned his head back against the seat and closed his eyes.

“What if it doesn’t?” Donna asked seriously.

“We get used to having our pictures taken and saying no comment. Something will blow up eventually and knock us out of the news.”

“Pessimist,” Donna teased. She rested her head against his shoulder and took his hand, caressing it with her thumb. “We need to talk about something.”

“What’s up?” Josh leaned his cheek against the top of her head comfortably.

“I heard what you were saying last night about living arrangements and you’ve got a point,” Donna said. “It’s hard enough figuring out where my dry cleaning is, let alone where I’ve got clean pantyhose. And I was talking to Annabeth about it and she knows someone who needs to sublet a place for a few months.”

Josh couldn’t help the smile that was spreading across his face. “Are you thinking about getting in touch of this friend of Annabeth’s?”

“I might, if I had another place to live,” Donna said coyly.

“You know, I think we’ve reached the point in our relationship where it’d work if we lived together. What do you think?” Josh pulled away so he could look her in the eyes.

“I think we’re there,” Donna agreed.

“Then what do you say you move in with me?” Josh suggested. “I’ve got plenty of closet and bathroom space.”

Donna smiled at him. “I think that’s a great idea.”

“As long as we agree on one thing.”

“What’s that?” Donna asked.

“This is a permanent thing,” Josh said earnestly. “Agreed?”

“Agreed.” Donna nodded, sealing the deal with a kiss.

END

[other tales]

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